If you are searching jokes about Indians, stay here and read these selection of Indian jokes and jokes about Indians.
1. Two Tribes Were Visiting Each Other
Two tribes were visiting each other. The men were in council and the leader of one tribe, wishing to make conversation said, “I did not sleep well, last night.” At this he put his hands to his head and gestured like horns. “A horned owl kept me awake.” He said.
At that the elders of the other tribes arose and came over to shake his hand. The man looked at his companion in surprise. “What did I say?”
His friend said. “Well, I’m not sure, but I think you just gave away a beef
2. Indian Scout
An old Wild West fort is about to be attacked. The wily old General sends for his trusty Indian Scout. “You must use all your years of skill in trying to estimate the sort of army we are up against here.”
The trusty Indian Scout laid down and put his ear to the ground… “Large war party,” he says, “maybe three hundred braves, four chiefs, two on black stallions, two on white stallions. All have war paint … many, many guns. Medicine man also with them.”
“Good grief!” exclaims the General, “you can tell all of that just by listening to the ground???”
“No, General,” replied the Scout, “I can see under the gate.
3. Indian Chief’s Signal
An Indian chief is driving his Cadillac somewhere at Nevada. Suddenly his car gets broken. He examines it, and reveals that a technician must be called. But the chief has only $4, and no credit card (unfortunately B-) ). So he gathers some wood, makes a fire and signals his tribe with its smoke: “Hey, send somebody to my location with $500!” The tribe accepts this signal, but to make sure in its meaning, signals back – once again, with the smoke:
“OK, chief, but why so much ?”
At this moment a ground test of nuclear bomb is being held on the test field nearby. A huge mushroom-like cloud of smoke rises into the sky, The tribe signals:
“Ok, Ok, chief, we just wondered, why to be so angry?
4. Ghost Indian
Two Ponca men were sitting out on a back road visiting. All at once there was a tapping on the window.
“Ah Hoh!” “Hey guy!” “I think there is a ghost tapping on the window!”
Sure enough a wizened face with long flowing white hair was there just out side the window.
The Ponca man driving shoved his foot down on the gas and immediately was doing 60 miles and hour.
“Step on it!” “He’s still out there!” And sure enough, there was another tapping at the window.
The driver shoved his foot to the floor again! This time he was doing ninety (90) miles an hour.
Still the ghostly figure tapped on the window.
“You better giver ‘er some more gas!” “He’s still out there.”
“I can’t go any faster, I’ve got her up to 120 miles an hour.
About that time the little old man motioned for the passenger to roll the window down, which he did.
“Say Boys!” “I was wanting to know, do you need a shove to get out of this mud hole?
5. Grandpa, don’t you wish all the white men …
“Grandpa, don’t you wish all the white men would go back to Europe?” the young Sioux asked.
“Not till they pay us for the Black Hills!” the old man snapped defiantly.
6. He Lied to Me
An Indian man was violently whipping one of his young sons. A man passing by said. “Say now!” “Why are you whipping that boy.”
“He lied to me.” “He pushed over the out house and then told me he didn’t do it.”
That is no reason to whip him. George Washington cut down a cherry tree and his father did not whip him to get to the truth.
“Yeah but, George Washington’s father was not in that Cherry tree when his son cut it down.
7. The Lone Ranger and Tonto Went Camping
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep. Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says,
“Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see?”
The Lone Ranger replies, “I see millions of stars.”
“What that tell you?” asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, “Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What’s it tell you, Tonto?”
Tonto is silent for a moment, then says, “Kemo Sabe, you dumber then buffalo chip. Someone has stolen tent.
8. An Evil Atheist Explorer
An evil Atheist explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself “Oh God, I’m screwed!!!!!.”
There is a ray of light from heaven and a voice booms out: “No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you.”
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceeds to bash the living heck out of the chief.
As he stands above the lifeless body, breathing heavily and surrounded by 100 natives with a look of shock on their faces, Gods voice booms out again: “Okay, NOW you’re screwed.
9. Fry Bread
The old tribal chairman was on his death bed. He had only hours to live when he suddenly smelled the scent of fry-bread wafting into his room. Aaahhhh, He loved fry-bread more than anything else in the world.
With his last bit of energy, he pulled himself out of bed. . . Down the stairs and into the kitchen he went. There was his beloved wife, Lillian, kneading the dough for a new batch. As he reached for one of the fresh steaming fry-breads, he got smacked across the back of his hand by the wooden spoon his wife was holding. “Leave them alone!” she said. “They’re for the funeral.
10. Weather Indian
A film crew was on location deep in the desert. One day an Old Indian went up to the director and said, “Tomorrow rain.”
The next day it rained.
A week later, the Indian went up to the director and said, “Tomorrow storm.”
The next day there was a hailstorm.
“This Indian is incredible,” said the director. He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather. However, after several successful predictions, the old Indian didn’t show up for two weeks.
Finally the director sent for him. “I have to shoot a big scene tomorrow,” said the director, “and I’m depending on you. What will the weather be like?”
The Indian shrugged his shoulders. “Don’t know,” he said. “Radio broken.